Hi I’m David. If you’ve ever invited me to a party you can skip this. You know me as that guy who always brings cheese. A lot of super tasty cheese. (Or maybe you invited me cause you know I’ll be that guy?) Yup, I’m the chap who arranged cheese on a board and covered it in fruit, breads and candy. (Yup, candy is great on a cheese board.) I’m the dude who brings his own mustard too because I gave up on hosts having cheese-friendly mustards.

I love feeding people. I love making it look pretty. I love seeing people smile. So I make cheese plates all the time for every occasion.  And I love the opportunity to create themed plates! Fancy parties to D&D games, I turn it out.

Weird thing? I’m not a cheese snob. Don’t get me wrong I’ll try anything and super weird cheeses are fun to play with. Covered in mold? Hand it over! Slimy? Why not! BUT I really adore the basics. Sharp cheddar, creamy brie, Manchego, Swiss and a bit of Blue are all I need to make me the happiest cheese-boy in the word. (Ok, ok, and a bottle of wine.)

So it was a very logical progression from doing this privately to doing it professionally. Actually, I was at the Hollywood Bowl and my friend bought the Bowl’s cheese plate and I was horrified. Firstly horrified that I hadn’t planned my day better so I could swing by and make a proper cheese plate for the concert! We get busy right? And secondly what by they were passing off as a cheese plate! I mean come on!  Six slices of American cheese, toast, an apple and a few wrinkled grapes?  I said, “This is some bullshit. I should make my own cheese plates people can bring to the bowl!”

So here you are!

My cheese boxes are simple and fun. They have a few different kinds of cheeses and a bunch of fun pairings. The pairings cover the important flavors that play with cheese: salty, sweet, spicy, and chocolate. (Don’t doubt me.) As well as crackers and/or bread you might find little surprises to fight over! Also note you’ll be getting a lot of cheese, none of this six-slice or a single spread of Roquefort nonsense! Eat my friends! EAT!

And if you’re wondering “What’s with the bard theme?” I’m a nerd. I’m also a storyteller and playwright. And I love being a bard and telling fairy and fantastic tales! So when I was looking on how to market and arrange the boxes I thought “Go with what you love.”  So hence: Here be dragons! No not really, just cheese and meats, but designed in olde story themes.  I always image my plates, boards and boxes being served in an olde tavern by a handsome wench to a Dwarf, a Rouge, a Wizard and an half-Elf with issues!

I know you’re going to enjoy these boxes! If you want to add or change items I can do that too! Any kind of custom orders are available with a few days notice. It’s really just me, and occasionally my nephew, making these up -so patience please. I also enjoy have small event catering. Of course I also have a specialty party box for my fellow nerds! Game night will never be the same!

Your humble bard,

David